Dealing with Grief · 4 May 2019
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
This work is in the public domain.
We all deal with grief in different ways. Some cry, some scream, some pray to God. Some grieve publicly. Some grieve privately. The point is that we all grieve in different ways. One of my ways just happens to be writing.
If you have been reading my blog for any length of time, you have seen different tributes to different people I have known who have passed from this life. This one is a little different. For while I grieve deeply for a young man who was in my class, I cannot fathom how he ended it. And I certainly cannot condone it.
It does not make any sense to us when a person ends his or her life with suicide. Especially, when there are so many resources out there for people who might be contemplating it. Especially, when there are loving people who support you. The pain of this life is over for those who leave, but it gets transferred and multiplied to those who are still left behind.
We are left wondering: What we could have done better to support the person? Why could we not have seen? Why did the person not reach out? Why wasn’t I good enough?
The problem with these questions and others like them is that they can never be answered. At least not by us. Maybe not even by the person who left. For sometimes that person does not even know what he or she is missing.
When my student left us, my question was: Did I show him enough of Jesus of Nazareth? Did I let him know that Jesus loves him and so do I? I know that I can never be enough for any person, but Jesus can be. And so I wondered if I had done enough to show him and tell him of God’s love. I will not know the answer to that question in this lifetime, but I will do the best I can to keep showing people I meet that God loves them and so do I. I can keep showing and telling people that the cross and the subsequent empty tomb are what we need. Whatever our circumstances.
Which brings me back to grief.
In my grief for my student, I came up with a rap song. I know. It seems crazy to write a rap song to tell people to stick around. But here it is. My public way of grieving.
Don’t Go There
Chorus:
(So) Don’t go there, ‘cuz there’s no turning back
No, don’t go there, ‘cuz we’ve all got your back
Your family, your friends, and Jesus and me
We are here for you, I hope that you can see
So don’t go there, (echo) No don’t go there
So don’t go there, (echo) No don’t go there
‘Though the world has got you down
You always play the clown
And when you’re in despair
You act like you don’t care
There are feelings deep inside
That you always try to hide
But there’s One above who cares
Yes, He hears all your prayers.
Chorus
All my strength comes from above
I can cover you with love
And with Jesus by your side
You don’t ever need to hide
Just remember that we care
And you can come in your despair
Yes, we are here for you
In good times and bad times too.
Chorus
© 2019 Michael T. Miyoshi
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